“I will be late because I need to eat before I come “
“My body needs a rest sorry I can’t make it”
“I can’t take your call because I have zero energy”
Just straight up no …no explanation.
Boundaries are just so damn important especially if your anything like me and just let people drain all your energy until you’re a puddle on the floor.
You’re not disrespecting the other person by looking after yourself first. You have to put your oxygen mask on first right. Or it won’t end well. Well, it didn’t for me.
It’s awesome to do things for other people but some people will just take advantage of that. My motto is you should never help someone more than they are helping themselves. As an empath sometimes you can put others needs in front of your own.
Some people just like the way you make them feel. Relationships should be reciprocated and you should feel good after an encounter. Not drained like they sucked all your energy away. It should be a sharing of energy. Pouring into each other
Ditch the drama. Ditch the negativity. Life is too short to drain yourself in order to be seen as the nice person. Boundaries are necessary. They are not selfish. Your family and friends won’t like it when you start to work on yourself and put boundaries in place. It’s so foreign, as you have always been available before. They will get over it. It’s time to put your energy into things that make you happy. It’s about balance. If it feels terrible to put yourself first try every time you do something nice for someone else, you then treat yourself and do something just for you. Balance.
I’ve had to leave a lot of relationships behind that I never thought would end. I saw myself as loyal to death, once you are in my circle you stay there. Sometimes we need to revaluate these friendships. Do they bring you up? Do they make you feel supported and loved? Or do they make you feel like you need to give a lot in order to keep the friendship? I remember buying a present for someone purely because I knew she would be upset with me if I didn’t spend money on her. I normally make gifts and I knew it wouldn’t sit well with her. I’m not here to buy or impress people but I felt such guilt and pressure to impress her. She wasn’t my people.
I always find parents saying they have to put their children first. Filing our own cup first means we will be happy and motivated to make the best choices. If you are drained completely, how are you meant to not lose your temper? You come first. In turn you are teaching the kids when they are parents that they should look after themselves still. Self-care is important. So many prioritize their partner’s or workplace needs before their own. No more.
Who knew you could just leave people on read online until you have the energy to get back to them. I would feel so terrible if I didn’t respond straight away. I knew how it felt to feel rejected by others doing this to me. So, I would have anxiety every time I touched my phone in the past because I didn’t know how to protect my energy first. Now I just won’t open my messages until I’m ready to socialize. It’s okay to say no! We shouldn’t be available 24/7 it’s not normal to be that pulled energetically. It’s exhausting.
The way we are living on Earth at the moment is so busy. So, tolling on our minds and bodies. We need time away from the demands of life and others and take some time to breathe. To slow down and be one with nature again.
It’s okay to have boundaries and necessary to fill up your cup first.
Permission to release the guilt. It’s not selfish its self-care. it may take others a while to adjust to this version of you. if they are your real friends they will i promise you will feel less depleted and empowered.
Cosmic warrior. xx